As a famous proverb says “Birds of a feather flock together”, individuals with a common interest clutter to form a circle of friends. As a rule, friends are made when a person joins a particular stereotype in which he identifies himself. Usually, this type of bonding results in the formation of sub cultures. In my opinion, it’s always best to understand the core basics of every sub culture so that you can easily interact with people regardless of their age and gender. But, on the brighter side, interacting with different people enables an individual to develop on a higher level.
But the fact remains there are thousands of people out there who are unable to adjust to a society. In other words, they are labeled as social misfits. But, in most cases, people who are socially inactive are reported to suffer from depression, anxiety and other mental disorders. In a psychological perspective, engaging in social activities helps in the enhancement of mental health of a person to a certain extend.
Very often, we come across people who are highly intelligent, yet they lack the basic abilities of social adoptions. Such people are those who make a very few friends at school and spend their free times by individual activities like reading and computer games. They are popularly labeled as ‘Nerds’ by the pop culture. Unfortunately, the folks out there fail to realize that the so called ‘nerds’ are ordinary people who lack interpersonal intelligence. According to Howard Gardner, a Harvard psychologist, interpersonal intelligence is one of the eight basics of human aptitude.
The good news is that social intelligence can be improved with much effort, just like any other intelligence. But on the other hand, studies have linked social competence with academic achievement. However, poor social skills are worse than poor spelling.
From an early age, a child learns the first lesson of social interaction from the mothers lap. This can be illustrated in the way a baby communicates to his or her mother for the basic needs. Say for example that he or she is hungry. The baby tries to convince this message by crying for food. As the baby grows up, he starts to interact with other people. Gradually, he learns to behave in accordance to his environment. In this way, he is transformed to a civilized individual.
In order to adapt to the social environment, one should take the initiatives to explore the vibes of the social life. Try to push yourself and remember that being a couch potato doesn’t help. Hopefully, you can make friends who have a common interest. But it’s not necessary that other people should have exactly the same interests as yours. Always remember the fact that each person has different tastes.
One of the best ways to enhance social interaction skill is to join a club or a sport team. For this, find out your area of expertise. Next, browse through the list of clubs that are established in your locality. Once you find the club that caters to your interest, find a way to join them.
Volunteering is also a great way to interact with new people. Try to participate in the developmental activities of your neighborhood. This method is useful for those people who have moved to a new city. By interacting with the neighbors, you can learn the general taste of the people.
Apart from this, some people find social networking sites as a platform to meet new people. But see for that you keep a distance with these virtual friends… mainly because, of their dark intentions which can trap you in situational predicaments…and beware of perverts and molesters out there!
Once you have mastered the techniques of social interaction, the next thing you have to do is to learn the tactics of effective communication. For this, you should also consider the view points of the other party. Remember not to rush in a conversation and also try to see for the fact that the decoder (the other party) understands your point of view… and always keep in mind to have a good eye contact and appropriate gesture. A bad body language sometimes reflects the level of self esteem and aggression. This is due to the fact that the other party can perceive your body language a subconscious level. Try not to hurt their ego by the use of abusive or rude language. Take care that you understand from their perspective. In this way you tend to agree with them. However, disagreeing to a certain extend is healthy for a good friendship. After all, this enables the latter to speculate from your point of view.
Another way to enhance the social skill is by pleasing others. Think twice before you speak and always believe in first impression. You can also try to highlight your positive traits. But never ever speak in a way that you are bragging or emphasizing your achievements. To show that you are not bragging, flattery to a certain level is required. On the other hand, too much of flattery can send a negative impression to the receiver. Indeed, you should be capable of keeping a balance between the both.
In addition to this, a positive outlook can bring a significant change in your social skills. For this reason, try not to judge people or label them as a particular stereotype. Always try to see something good in everyone. This kind of attitude can make you flexible and well adjusted. It’s always good to be jack of all trades so that you can start a conversation that they are interested in.
Thus, you can conclude that social skill is a method of mutual understanding and organized thinking.
Originally posted 2009-11-04 05:38:00.
